Mad Libs’ Career-College Edition

At Higher Ed Watch, we have written about the massive astroturf lobbying campaign that the for-profit higher education industry waged this summer against regulations that the Obama administration has proposed that would penalize proprietary school programs that saddle students with unmanageable levels of debt.

By overwhelming the U.S. Department of Education with tens of thousands of comments from students, faculty members, and alumni, for-profit college leaders and lobbyists mostly succeeded in getting the White House to delay finalizing the proposed “Gainful Employment” rules — which appears to have been their goal all along. They are obviously hoping that a Republican landslide in the upcoming mid-term elections will force the administration to back off.

Even a cursory review of the comments posted on regulations.gov make abundantly clear the extent to which these responses were manufactured by the colleges and lobbying groups themselves. Hundreds, if not thousands, of the comments repeat the same talking points ad nauseam, with only slight alterations to make them appear more genuine.

But some of the comments are even more revealing, as they don’t even try to mask their origins. Today, for your viewing pleasure, we present two such comments that the organization formerly known as the Career College Association submitted last month to Jessica Finkel of the Education Department on behalf of a for-profit college employee named Hugh and a student named Farnaz. These responses to the proposed rules are some of our personal favorites, as they remind us of those old Mad Libs books we used to find so entertaining:

From Hugh:

RE: Please Oppose the Proposed Rule on Gainful Employment

Ms. Finkel:

As an employee of [INSTITUTION], I am writing to oppose the Department of Educations proposedgainful employmentdefinition. At [INSTITUTION], we witness on a daily basis the drive and determination of our students to meet their career goals. We work very hard to provide them with the education and training necessary to obtain high demand jobs and compete in todays competitive workforce. [DESCRIBE THE SPECIFIC PROGRAMS OFFERED BY THE INSTITUTIONS AND HOW THEY MEET WORKFORCE AND STUDENT NEEDS.]

From Farnaz:

RE: Opposition to Proposed Gainful Employment Rule

Ms. Finkel:

I am a career college student at [INSTITUTION] studying [PROGRAM]. [INSTITUTION] is providing me with the education and training necessary to obtain the job Ive always wanted as a [CAREER]. The Department of Educations proposed gainful employment rule could take this dream away from me and thousands of other students by denying us the federal financial aid to which we are entitled [EXPLAIN ANY OTHER CONCERNS YOU HAVE ABOUT LOSING ACCESS TO THE PROGRAM OF YOUR CHOICE AT YOUR INSTITUTION.]

Do not finalize this proposed rule. Limiting federal financial aid funding will prevent thousands of students like me from earning a certificate or degree and entering the workforce in the career of their choice.